Today sucks

Well I had the luck of starting my period today. I was kinda hoping that I was pregnant this time, but I'm not. After yesterday I would have been the happiest person in the world if I had have found out that I was pregnant. Well there isn't much to be done about it I guess I can try again next month. I am really starting to feel like God hates me. I me I just can't pray enough or do anything to have him answer my prayers so I think he is not even listening let alone cares, but maybe that's just me even though it's been like this for years. Sorry if I'm bringing you down I just had to get that out there it has been on my mind for a while now. I'm just really depressed because I am getting sick of this routine and want my chance to be a mother. I have way too many people throwing their pregnancy in my face as if I am incompetent or something.